Extra, Extra

Another couple months. Another blog post. Try not to get overwhelmed with the amazing frequency. I know you’re waiting to hear stories of the great accomplishments I’ve been hard at work achieving in my small village in Georgia. But, I wouldn’t want to boast, so I’ll keep those to myself. Still, here is a list of some small things of note (read: headline news—it doesn’t take much to make the front page in Tsinandali).

1. My host nephew and niece had their respective 5^th and 1^st birthdays with the obligatory respective supras. In a related note, I’ve developed my skill of not drinking those toasts bolomde (to the end—in other words, emptying the glass). It takes slight of hand and other diversionary tactics. Something for the resume.

2. I’ve experienced several more unofficial holidays (love day, giorgoba, etc) that students make almost official holidays when they skip school…or at least skip out after the third lesson because they’ve got supras to attend. There are some things I will miss about this country.

3. I’ve learned a very important new Georgian word—ცოფი (rabies). Yes, I was bitten by a Georgian dog, which probably wasn’t rabid. Still generated lots of questions about rabies and also instant celebrity. Not that I’m already not one of the most recognized people in the village…(In another note on the Georgian language, I tested into advanced mid for my knowledge of the language. NDB).

4. Brianpeteroba (celebration of two volunteers’ birthdays) is epic every time.

5. The new 1955 burger (carmelized onions and bacon and bbq-esque sauce) from McDonald’s is pretty balling. And, yes, don’t judge. McDonald’s is actually hip in foreign countries. Plus, it’s something different from khinkali.

6.I’ve had my last SPA (small projects assistance) meeting. During these meetings, a group of volunteers, including yours truly, would allocate funds to volunteer grant proposals. The end of my involvement on this committee means: a) my service is coming to a close; b) no more time reading budgets; c) I have to find another way to get reimbursed trips into Tbilisi…Also, if you’re interested in supporting volunteer projects in Georgia, go to this website. Enter in Georgia and you’ll see a list of projects awaiting your American dollar billz.

7. I’ve been rejected by the Foreign Service. Again. Third time’s the charm? See you next year, FSOT. Yes, I’m desperate and needy and I’ll keep coming back for more. I know, it’s an unhealthy relationship.

8. I will travel long distances for some good food. Trip to Signagi for the one non-Georgian restaurant in the region. Done. Travel to Casa de Jefferson for his gastronomical creations. Done.

9. I’ve given the newly arrived G11s (the newest group of trainees in Georgia) all my knowledge. Or at least told them how to take a bucket bath and use copious amounts of wet wipes for hygienic purposes.

10. You probably shouldn’t send me any more packages. I know, I know, you’re dying to do so. However, it might not make it to Georgia before I leave (This is also a last attempt at reverse psychology because I always want more care packages).

That’s what’s new and good in village life. Only one more month of school left, and then another month of Sakartvelo after that. On the horizon, I’m planning an English end-of-school and end-of-service extravaganza. We’ll read poems and then do snaps. And, of course, supra. I’ve also been working out the post COS (close of service) trip itinerary. I’m thinking beach. I’m thinking food. I’m thinking amenities (but on a frugal budget). Thus far, the plan is to hit up the UAE and Thailand. Random, but awesome. I’ll try to update the blog from time to time in my remaining months. To appease the avid readers until then, go to this website to see some profiles of my fellow volunteers in Georgia. Enjoy!

I'm Alive

Possibilities for the reason I’ve been MIA from the blog since January:

A. I was bride-napped.

B. I’ve become so integrated and productive in my community that I literally have no time for frivolous blogs.

C. I’ve forgotten English due to my extraordinary Georgian.

D. I was a victim of a fiery marshutka head-on collision and suffered complete amnesia.

E. I am lazy.

So, I’ll leave this one a mystery, and you can just guess which one is correct. It’s a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma, covered in tkemali sauce.

Since winter vacation, the months have been ticking by slowly—probably because there’s been a lot of repetition from last year. We went back to school. Children did not come back to school. Thus, I sat in a cold classroom, waiting to bestow my impressive knowledge on absent students. Snow came, and the pechi (wood stove) became my best friend. But, I also cheated on pechi with my other lover, the hot water bottle. February dragged on because of its complete lack of holidays. How can I get through a whole month when there are no days off? (Yes, I am ruined for real work weeks/months/years upon return to America).

Finally, March arrived, but spring did not come with it. There was, however, the return of the Georgian school holiday because March is women’s month. I celebrated with a group of teachers from school. It’s maybe the one time a year where the women can relax, i.e. they don’t have to serve at their own supra. We had our feast at a restaurant where I gave at least one toast with standing ovation. Then again, it doesn’t take more than a few Georgian words to make this happen. Low expectations for the American. I like it.

Other than holding another session of Writing Olympics this year (yay creative writing!), the winter months have been a blur. Snow, pechi, mud, school, cold, supra, lessons...but I continue to be the most productive volunteer ever in Tsinandali history (maybe because I am the first).

Last week brought the most excitement in these occasionally bleak times. I was in Tbilisi for my Close of Service (COS) Conference. So, now I’m totally prepared to face the new, exciting world after Peace Corps, which will be coming in 4-5 months. If I have a panic attack in the toothpaste aisle of Walmart, due to the sheer number of choices, I am equipped with the proper techniques to move on. We talked strategies about resumes, interviews, selling our “Peace Corps story,” and networking (that doesn’t involve toasts and three shots of chacha). Time to brush up on American pop culture for small talk. Why did Charlie Sheen go crazy? What are your thoughts on Rebecca Black’s “Friday?” What's an iPad?

But COS was not just a time for learning, it was also a time for hobnobbing with important people—the Georgian Prime Minister and National Security Advisor, the U.S. ambassador, members of the Georgian press, etc. No big deal. We had our final ceremony, received some certificates, and ate some Georgian food. No true celebration is complete until the khinkali comes out. So, now it’s back to the village for our remaining time. Have to start working on my legacy. You know, so that every volunteer that comes after me will feel inferior because people will say I loved children so much that I rescued them from burning buildings while simultaneously teaching them perfect English. It’s a hard job, but someone has to do it.

The Prime Minister

The Paparazzi

National Security Advisor and Ambassador Bass